A Vintage Daniel Craig–Sienna Miller Cheating Scandal … and Other Unearthed Gems From This Week’s Tabloids


Us Weekly

Jude Law & Sienna Miller & Daniel Craig: “Phone-hacking victim Jude Law made a startling confession while testifying against News of the World editors.” In 2005, the newspaper had run a story “that his then-fiancée Sienna Miller, 32, had cheated on him with her Layer Cake costar Daniel Craig around the time Law’s phone was hacked.” Was that before or after Jude banged the nanny? Law and Craig had been friends for many years, but no longer speak. Law “admitted he confronted his friend” Craig. “We had known each other for many, many years, so the conversation took all sorts of turns.” CLOSER 2! I bet that was an interesting conversation, and boy, do I wonder what they talked about! He reportedly “urged Craig to confess” about the infidelity to his girlfriend at the time. “His friendship with Craig, 45, never recovered.” Law and Miller split up in 2006.

Lil’ People in Justin Bieber’s Life: 

  • Lil Scrappy: Bieber spent “$75,000 at Miami’s King of Diamonds strip club to toast his pal’s 30th birthday.”
  • Chief Khalil: “A Sacramento native, this singer, 19, was arrested with Bieber in Miami Beach on suspicion of DUI and drag racing.”
  • Lil Twist: “The 21-year-old Texan was arrested for DUI in July 2013 while driving Bieber’s brand new chrome Fisker Karma sports car.”
  • Lil Za: “After getting booked for drug possession at Bieber’s house January 14, Za, 19, reportedly smashed a phone while in holding.”
  • Lil Wayne: Weezy “opened his Miami skate park to the pop star the day of his arrest.”

Whoever reported this “Lil” story deserves a Pulitzer; it is amazing.

Emma Roberts’s Passport Photo: “I keep my passport in a cute case, but I can’t disguise the terrible picture. I’m 17 with jet-black and not smiling.” Ooh, goth! She’s currently reading Stephen King’s The Shining. Ooh, double goth!

Vanessa Hudgens: “There’s nothing cooler than looking in the mirror and not seeing yourself.”

Zooey Deschanel: Zooey “loves Super Bowl parties.” She will be at one somewhere, possibly watching the postshow New Girl episode with Prince.

Things You Don’t Know About John Legend (Excerpted)

  • “As a kid, I wanted to be a musician, but I also aspired to be Andy Griffith’s lawyer character, Ben Matlock.”
  • “My wife, Chrissy Teigen, is the expert cook, but I make a soulful mac ’n’ cheese.”
  • “I was a wedding singer as a teenager.”
  • “I’ve delayed my stage time to see the end of a close Ohio State game!”
  • “I met Michael Jackson on a trip to Bahrain.”
  • “My first paid acting gig was one of Kyra Sedgwick’s lovers in 2005’s Loverboy.”
  • “I once won a spelling bee.”
  • “I was my high school’s student body president and prom king.”
  • “I played piano on Lauryn Hill’s ‘Everything Is Everything.'”
  • “My favorite music to set the mood is by Marvin Gaye. Hopefully your favorite is by yours truly?”
  • “Before every show, I eat half a rotisserie chicken.”

Kanye West: “What the media calls ‘meltdowns’ … I don’t call them meltdowns at all. I call them ‘turn-ups.'”

How Did Taylor Swift’s Grammy Dress Feel?: “Scratchy.” That’s how it looked like it felt! She looked beautiful, though, which I guess is the point of uncomfortable clothes. “It’s like a suit of armor.” We all know Tay loves her knights and ladies.

Hugh Dancy and Claire Danes: He’s on Hannibal, she’s on Homeland. The married couple “bond over playing characters beloved for their eccentricities.” They help each other keep it from getting too campy. He says, “I come home and say, ‘You’ve gone through this. I’m not completely overdoing it, right?’ There’s a real insecurity with a role on the edge. She understands that.” D’awwww. That’s cute.

Anna Faris: “My dream evening is a glass of wine, my husband, the couch, and watching Overboard.” Love u always, Anna Faris.

How Would Melissa Gilbert Greet Shannen Doherty? “I wouldn’t say anything. I would just punch her in the nose.” (Gilbert’s husband cheated on her with Doherty.)

Misc/Etc: “NO TARGET TOO TINY!” “I am truly sorry for the mistakes I have made and hope to become the husband and father my family deserves.” “I can stuff that sucker into a pair of jeans and you’d never know” “called the infant ‘desperately in need of a waxing'” “Paul McCartney joked with Yoko Ono, who he has called ‘badass.'” “Her order: a hot dog” “gained 15 pounds and chopped off her hair” “she can’t get enough deviled eggs” “I have a Spice Girls keychain” “why she dislikes her ‘dimply’ butt” “He felt like he was with a completely different woman. Like he was cheating on me.” “Sometimes you’ve got to know when it’s time to leave the party” “I was young and dumb and full of ‘wisdom.’ It’s not pierced anymore.” “As he waits to introduce Metallica, Jared Leto cleans his teeth with a toothpick.”


Lindsay Lohan Is Back on Coke: SAD FACE. Lohan is living in a $16,800-a-month SoHo apartment paid for by Oprah, who is still filming a reality series about the fallen starlet. “Lindsay was 100 percent doing lines of cocaine at the apartment Oprah got her. She was doing it out in the open, in front of three friends.” Lohan claims she is still sober, and was just at Sundance promoting her new project, Inconceivable. On December 18, “Lindsay was desperate to track down her former fling, model Morgan O’Connor — and some drugs. Lindsay went to a hotel to find Morgan and met several models and invited them over. They went with Lindsay to her house and did a bunch of blow.” She bragged to her friends that she was making Oprah future money, supposedly saying, “I own Oprah’s Next Chapter. What is she without me? Oprah is so 2009!” Famous last words. “An eyewitness says that Lindsay was snorting cocaine at a friend’s mansion during the star-studded Art Basel festival in Miami Beach.” Cocaine at Art Basel? I’m shocked. “Lindsay was doing lines of cocaine in a bedroom with friends. She ended up doing so much that she had a total coke freak-out, screaming ‘Who took my stash?!’ Lindsay then accused 24-year-old Barron Hilton of stealing from her, which may have led to his beatdown courtesy of Lindsay’s friend Ray LeMoine.” Ugh, this is all so depressing. “She kept whining ‘I am a celebrity. I can’t just go around asking everyone for coke!’ It was so embarrassing.” Yes. Yes it is.

The Sandra Bullock Diet: “Sandra figured out that she eats smaller portions when she uses a cocktail fork. It forces her to eat more slowly, and she winds up eating less.” Why not get crazy and use, like, a teeny-tiny little spoon?

Charlize Theron & Sean Penn: This is still happening. “The man who once dumped bombshell Scarlett Johansson in favor of single life and recently hooked up with ex-wife Madonna has fallen head over heels for Charlize Theron.” Has she tamed Spicoli? Only time will tell. “He can’t get enough of her. I wouldn’t be surprised if he pops the question soon.” Friends say “Charlize is the only woman who can handle Sean’s strong personality. She isn’t intimidated by him. Sean wants to be with someone who takes no nonsense from him or anyone else, and he feels like he’s finally found his equal.” Um, Madonna is going to KILL YOU.

Kristen Wiig & Fabrizio Moretti: Back on! “The Strokes drummer and the Spoils of Babylon actress, 40, who were known as Hollywood’s hardest-partying couple before their split in July, are seeing if they can be around each other under calmer circumstances.” This means during the daytime, sober, I imagine. They’ve been going on “daily hikes and swims, being in bed before midnight, and putting distance between themselves and party pals like Jon Hamm.” Whoa, whoa, how did this become about “party pal Jon Hamm”? That dude loves swimming!

Misc/Etc: “FAMILY TRIP To Save The Relationship!” “Scott partied nonstop after his mother died, and it continued through his father’s death” “GIRLS GONE WILD LENA DUNHAM UNRAVELING!” “Twinsies!” “JAMES SPADER LOSING HIS SIGHT?” “Naomi Watts picked up a few of Mother Nature’s treats” “Rosario Dawson made the best of the East Coast’s crushing blizzard” “hopelessly boring” “Taylor Swift showed off her impressive pins in tiny denim shorts while shopping for veggies” “He knew how much Molly wanted to have a child with him and all he wants to do is make her happy” “She just doesn’t understand why she can’t keep a guy long-term” “He thinks she’s too insecure and nags him constantly, and she feels like he’s completely removed and doesn’t care about her feelings.” “She thought she’d be married with a baby by the time she turned 45!” “I prefer my body after I’ve had kids to before” “his recent arrest for Molly” “Kitten Bowl”

Life & Style

Larry King & Jay Z Be All Night: “No early-bird special for this guy! The veteran newsman, 80, and his wife Shawn, 54, partied into the wee hours — with Jay-Z! — at the opening of 1Oak nightclub in LA on Jan. 25.”

Lance Bass on Justin Bieber: “I wish he would get a little jail time just so he would know ‘Oh my God, I am human.’ He doesn’t know what reality is.”

Jennifer Lopez: “I really missed acting. I have so much to offer as an actor at this point in my life.” CALL STEVEN SODERBERGH.

Taylor Swift’s Cat Addiction: “It is a daily struggle for me to not buy more cats.” Me too! But don’t buy cats, adopt them from a shelter!

Lorde: “I’ve learned how to interact with people. You have to make compromises.”

Katy Perry Prayed for Big Boobs: At age 11 she prayed, “God, will you please let me have boobs so big that I can’t see my feet when I’m lying down? I had no clue they would fall into my armpits eventually.”

Adrien Grenier’s CreekThe Entourage star went out for Dawson’s Creek  but failed to make the cut, according to Dawson himself, James Van Der Beek. “He was testing for both Dawson and Pacey and went home empty-handed, poor guy.” I think he’s OK!

Demi Lovato: “Lately when I’m by myself I end up writing country music.” FOLLOW YOUR MUSE, DEMI!

Anna Kendrick’s Beauty Obsession: “Individual false lashes. It’s an exercise in madness, but I really like it!” Her makeup don’t is “[d]ark lipstick. It doesn’t look good on me — I think I’m too pale and my lips are too thin.” She is embarrassed of the way she dressed when she first came to Hollywood. “I just wanted to look friendly, so I ended sometimes looking a little like I was at my bat mitzvah.” She is adorable.

Misc/Etc: “Money Shouldn’t Control You” “THE HUMILIATED SINGLE DAD IS READY TO QUIT!” “Somehow we don’t feel sorry for her!” “the Porn Diet! The actress just emulates the adult-entertainment stars who work out at her gym” “We should go clubbing tonight, wearing this” “WILD CLUBBING” “I wasn’t gonna post this” “The weather outside is frightful, but these A-list tots are just delightful” “I had a club sandwich and fries before I came” “I think it’s bulletproof” “BABY BOOTY” “An infinity pool, mountain views, an elevator and several enormous walk-in closets” “She just wants to be settled, not squatting in someone else’s house.” “I’m a real stay-at-home mom. Everything else became secondary.” “I’m entering my 40s” “trying too hard to look fashionable” “THINNER BY DINNER” “she might’ve poked the bear with the stick” “DOES YOUR JEWELRY MAKE YOU LOOK FAT?”


Kimye Prenup: She wants $10 million if they break up because he cheats, and a rule that he can’t be away from home for longer than a month at a time. He wants $20,000 if Kim has kontact with any of her exes, and a clause barring Kris Jenner from touching the couple’s money. “It’s all a wish list.”

Miley Cyrus on Tour: How is she preparing? “I’ve definitely watched a lot of Madonna’s tours.” She wants people to put their phones down and get immersed. “Sometimes that’s hard — there are people in the front row with their phones in front of their face, not getting involved. I’m like, put your phone down and actually dance and a be a part of the show!” She says it won’t be as outrageous as you think. “I want people to be like: ‘She did some things that were crazy, but at the end of the day it was about her voice.'” Say what you will about Miley, she can sing. “My tour rider used to ask for Guitar Hero and Frosted Flakes. Now I just kind of want the Guitar Hero.” I find it hard to believe stoner Miley doesn’t want the Frosted Flakes. “I know people make it seem that all I know how to do is come out and shock people. That isn’t what it is. I think what girls see is that there’s a feminist energy there.” I do!

Prince Harry Shaves for the Queen: “Queen Elizabeth II let it be known that she was not particularly pleased with the look her grandson, Prince Harry, brought back from his recent South Pole expedition, a charity trek to benefit wounded soldiers.” “Her majesty intensely dislikes beards, according to British press reports, so Harry’s ginger facial hair was a no-no.” Did Harry opt to shave his ginger beard? He did.

Misc/Etc: “She wakes up every morning in a state of anxiety about everything, from her bloated looks, her dwindling cash and even her recently lost laptop and the only thing that seems to calm her down is a glass of wine” “IT’S BEEN A BAD MONTH!” “Justin Bieber’s fall from innocence has reached its nadir” “It’s all about continuing to make money off the family name” “They had the door locked and there were some interesting sounds coming out” “I was told if I think someone has taken a photo of me that I can look through their phone” “had messy hair, her eyes were blank, and she was forceful” “an Instagram picture of her pregnant stomach, decorated with a miniature ‘Baby on Board’ sign attached to a bellybutton ring.” “during a dance-related argument” “She just got the okay to wear wedge sneakers” “She’s lost without a boyfriend in her life and hates to see anyone in a happy relationship — especially one of her exes” “seduction becomes effortless”

Filed Under: Tabloids, Jude Law, Daniel Craig, Sienna Miller, Justin Bieber, John Legend, Lindsay Lohan, Miley Cyrus, Charlize theron, Sean Penn, Kristen Wiig

Molly Lambert is a staff writer for Grantland.

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