Wait: ‘Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles’ Might Be OK??
The first couple of trailers for Michael Bay’s destruction of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles franchise were cut-and-dried: freaky-looking Turtles, Megan Fox as April O’Neil (??), and all the humor and dudeosity supplanted by grit, dub step, and Hans Zimmer–y BRAHHHHMMMMsplosions.
Now we’ve got this third trailer, screwing everything up. Suddenly Donatello, Leonardo, Michelangelo, and Raf are being themselves, bouncing around, saying shit like, “This is awesome!!” and, “That’s what I’m talkin’ about!” MIKEY IS A SURFER-BRO AGAIN! That’s my man/turtle! And while Splinter v. Shredder looks like Episode II Yoda v. Optimus Prime (super-evil draft), it also looks kinda awesome. AND THERE’S SKATEBOARDING!
I … suddenly … really … might see this movie. I didn’t want everything to be different. I didn’t want everything to suck. But if these heroes in a half shell are gonna order pizza and shred both pavement and snowy mountainsides, they might actually be my dudes?