Kendrick’s big 2014 return is being headlined by “i,” the track he dropped on September 23 to divisive reception. (For example, I can tell you for a fact that “i” is without a doubt a flawless Kendrick Lamar song. But you may not find that factually accurate somehow.) But regardless of where you land on this song, you’re gonna want to see K-Dot sing the words “I love myself” in front of a live audience for the first time (in Drake’s city, nonetheless; #powerplay).

Amazon picked up Red Oaks — its best new pilot! — and Hand of God, one of its worst.

Mark Hamill is the world’s biggest Letterman fan??

Nicholas Sparks is being sued for every kinda -ism.

A$AP Rocky returns.

So does Fiona Apple! She did the title theme for Showtime’s upcoming The Affair. Why would anyone watch anything except a TV show with a theme by Fiona?!

Joaquin Phoenix successfully evades the superhero movie casting net.

And apparently if Leo won’t play Steve Jobs, maybe Matt Damon (?), Ben Affleck (??), Christian Bale, or Bradley Cooper will.

Speaking of B-Coopz: American Sniper trailer!

Tarantino on his new programming position at L.A.’s New Beverly: “If people come, fine. If they don’t, fuck them.”

Harvey Dent is coming to Gotham, via Masters of Sex actor Nicholas D’Agosto. Sweet! Gotham is great! There’s already a Harvey, though: Harvey Bullock. Hmm. Harvey fight!

Triumph vs. evil Times Square mascots.

You’ll be able to watch the great and glorious Giancarlo Esposito in the sequel to The Maze Runner. (I guess you have to watch The Maze Runner first? Maybe not?)

Affleck refused to don a Yankees cap in Gone Girl.

And this 19,000th and final YouTube video of the week is of … Jennifer Garner impersonating her Yankees-hating husband.