In Touch

Is Kanye Gay and Secretly Dating Fashion Designer Riccardo Tisci? Kim Kardashian was humiliated after Vogue editors cropped her floral print bowling ball dress out of every shot of Kanye at the Met Ball. “But Kim’s humiliation ran much deeper than jabs about a gown. Some online commenters speculated Kanye, 35, is in a romantic relationship with the man who designed her controversial dress, Givenchy creative director Riccardo Tisci.” AIRHORN! “Kim freaked out. If it turns out Kanye is involved with Riccardo, she will be utterly embarrassed, more so than she’s ever been in her life.” But she’s done so many embarrassing things! “There are some facts Kim can’t deny. Kanye has spent her entire pregnancy living close to Riccardo in the French capital — 5,600 miles away from his girlfriend. And Riccardo recently purchased an apartment less than half a mile from Kanye’s in NYC’s Soho neighborhood.” A source says, “Kanye is obsessed with Riccardo. They have a very deep bond.” HOW DEEP? “The whispers got even louder when Bryan Boy, one of the most popular and respected fashion bloggers in the world, linked Kanye to Riccardo in January.” Bryan Boy tweeted, “Wait so Kanye West is gay? He and Riccardo Tisci were…lovers? And Kim Kardashian is a beard? Why am I the last to know?”

Looks like Kim is the last to know, actually. Kanye “refuses to use a cell phone” although that might just be a convenient excuse to keep Kim at arm’s length. “Contributing to the sting Kim’s feeling? She herself had suspicions about Kanye’s sexuality before she embarked on a relationship with him last year. He pursued her for years, but she felt there was no heat between them. She was convinced he was gay and kept rejecting him.” At that point, Kim was still on and off with Reggie Bush. After Bush dumped her, she went after Kris Humphries despite sharing no interests. “That’s typical of her — she’s always trying to fit a square peg in a round hole.” (Is that a gay innuendo?) “Kim may have outdone herself this time by picking a man who will never give her what she wants. While Kanye was famously obsessed with Kim for years, his infatuation evaporated when she finally gave in to him.” He just likes the chase, Kim! And then instead of taking care of her after he knocked her up, “Kanye ran. While Kim stressed in LA — and grew wildly insecure about her body as she turned to food for comfort — Kanye stuck close to Riccardo in Paris.” A friend of Kim’s admits that Riccardo and Kanye are “super close” and “spend a lot of time together at Kanye’s apartment.” Sketching fashion designs! Conspiracy theorists decided that Tisci designed Kim’s dress to look terrible on purpose. “Out of jealousy [over Kanye] I think Riccardo dressed Kim in this outfit to make her look ridiculous.” Riccardo snapped back that Kim was “the most beautiful pregnant woman I dressed in my career” but we have eyes, OK? That dress was hideous. “The dress debacle was definitely an issue between Kim and Kanye. How could part of her not blame him?”

Kanye has “checked out of the relationship. When he’s with her, he looks miserable. Kim’s completely humiliated and horrified. The last thing she needs is another failed relationship.” Oh, please. It would just make Kim’s narrative more Liz Taylorish if she runs through a string of gay men. Also I don’t know what’s up with Kanye, but he could also be bisexual! It happens!

Trouble in Paradise for John Legend & Chrissy Teigen? SAY IT AIN’T SO! THEY ARE PERFECT. “As singer John Legend’s wedding to model Chrissy Teigen approaches, the glamorous couple should be blissfully planning what John says will be a day filled with good music, good food, and good times. But their happiness was interrupted on May 9 by a report that John engaged in a steamy make-out session six nights earlier with a pretty blonde at an NYC restaurant.” Legend was at Acme in NYC, and “struck up a conversation with two women in their late 20s at the next table. Later in the evening, one of the women got up to go to the restroom and John, 34, followed her, pulling her into a bathroom with him for several minutes.” Chrissy denied the report and said “Don’t make up stories,” but a witness from Acme “confirms to In Touch that John did hit it off with one of the girls and went into the bathroom with her.” Legend and Teigen have been together for six years, and he proposed last year. “She refuses to believe it. John is so in love with her.”

Shanna Moakler Is Dumb: “I didn’t breast-feed … I just look at my breasts as sexual, and I think it’s incestual. It’s gross.” You are dumb.

Amanda Bynes Off the Rails and More Popular Than Ever! “Amanda Bynes’ transformation from Hollywood ingenue to train wreck has been unquestionably disturbing. The adorable teen star of her own Nickelodeon show is now a 27-year-old in crisis — shaving her head, going on profane Twitter rampages and wandering the streets of NYC talking to herself.” While some of Bynes’s “eyebrow-raising antics have led critics to wonder publicly whether she’s addicted to attention — or even mentally ill — the What a Girl Wants star has attracted a fascinated, and fiercely devoted legion of fans.” She has over a million Twitter followers who praise her light with tweets like “You are the queen!!!” and “Amanda Bynes is heroic beauty.” Kim Kardashian and Victoria’s Secret model Doutzen Kroes have fanned out over Amanda’s new look. Doutzen “lost her cool” when she spotted Bynes at Pacha. “People feel a connection to her.” according to “L.A. based behavior expert Dr. Damon Raskin, who doesn’t treat Amanda.” Raskin says “They want to cheer on someone everyone else is calling crazy. They want to see her succeed.” One fan set up a “shrine to Amanda on a street in NYC’s East Village. The Virgin Mary’s face on the candles was replaced with Amanda’s!” Another got a tattoo of Amanda’s eyeball enclosed in an Illuminati pyramid on his back.

Miley Cyrus & January Jones: At the Met Ball, “Miley Cyrus nearly came face to face with January Jones, the woman who reportedly torpedoed her engagement to Liam Hemsworth, 23.” They avoided each other all night, but “at one point Miley, 20, found herself just six feet from the Mad Men actress, 35. Miley would not even look at her.” Yeah, because then she would have to cut a bitch.

Gwyneth’s Giant Gate: “Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin’s neighbors are up in arms after the duo erected” a huge gate in front of their house. The “9-foot-high eyesore (3 feet higher than regulations allow)” sits “at the entrance to their $10.5 million home.”

Miranda Lambert Drinks the Pain Away: Lambert attended the Barnstable Brown Gala at the Kentucky Derby with four of her best female friends, “rocking out” at a Kid Rock performance and “knocking back cocktails” all night. “Conspicuously absent from the wild night was her husband of two years, Blake Shelton. Insiders say their marriage — a union initially made in country music heaven — hit a rough patch in the wake of reports linking Blake, 36, to a 23-year-old singer.” Shelton lives in L.A. while taping The Voice, while Lambert holds down the fort back home in Tishomingo, Oklahoma. “Miranda has been drinking a lot. She may act like everything is okay, but it’s not. You can see it in her eyes.” Shelton has denied reports of an affair with singer Cady Groves, but he is acting kind of guilty. He was seen disappearing into Cady’s trailer to “get hammered” after shooting a cameo in her video for “This Little Girl.” Blake is known for his drinking, but Miranda has picked up the slack lately. “For him, it’s cool to be the party boy. It works for his image on The Voice. And she plays into it to make them look like a fun couple and duo. But the fact is, things aren’t good between them.” Three days after their second anniversary on May 11, Shelton tweeted “I’m so drunk right now I just walked into a 7-11, put a bag of Skittles in my pants and shouted ‘Who wants to taste the rainbow?!!'” Lord, Blake.

Dylan & Mrs. Walsh? “On Beverly Hills 90210 she played mom to teen twins Brandon and Brenda (Jason Priestley and Shannen Doherty), but actress Carol Potter has revealed that she had a thing for one of their pals!” Yessssssss. “Luke Perry and I had a bit of a flirtation. He was hot!” I’ll ’ship it.

Misc/Etc: “She’s only 16” “Oh no, he didn’t!” “How ridiculous to see a 44-year-old woman with the skin of a 14-year-old.” “it should be named Kougar” “I looked like a shar-pei when I first delivered!” “Anyone can defy age with Photoshop!” “The ER is always fun” “Best part about the beach? The naked drive home.” “Suspicious package alert!” “a frat boy whose rowdy behavior affects his neighbor” “they don’t want something orange” “swaggy sweat suit” “We get out our aggression” “Hottest chaperone ever!” “her bones were jutting out” “She’s just a train wreck” “This is a nightmare” “Legally Bieber” “MALE LINGERIE” “She’s just too young for Ian”

Us Weekly

Zooey Deschanel: “I’m bangs and eyes. It’s who I am.”

Zach Braff Got Dumped the Night Before Prom: “The actor’s girlfriend dumped him the night before.” LOL. “Recalls Braff, 38: ‘She asked me to take her just as friends.’ (He did!)” LOLOL.

Things You Don’t Know About Michael Bublé (Excerpted) 

• “I love big dill pickles (that doesn’t sound good).”
• “I’m a flosser.”
• “I only wear Muppet socks and colored boxer briefs.”
• “I love taking my wife to Disney World. We even honeymooned there and slept in Cinderella’s castle.”
• “Growing up, I had a mullet.”
• “I would give up singing to be a hockey player.”
• “As a teen I had both ears pierced and listened to Guns N’ Roses and AC/DC.”
• “Dave Barry is my favorite writer.”
• “I love redheads — and one Argentinian blonde [his wife Luisana Lopilato].”
• “I think Slurpees are the greatest invention since insulin.”
• “I’ve never taken a drink or any other substance before a show.”
• “I’m not a fan of children’s charities. Kidding!”

Tobey Maguire on Meeting Leonardo DiCaprio: “I saw this string-bean, goofy kid throwing karate kicks and I thought, OK, that guy does not have a shot.”

Psy on Getting Dissed by Green Day’s Billie Joe: “I kind of like it. He’s saying I’m like herpes that keeps coming back. I think it’s really cool. And I appreciate that.”

Chrissy Teigen Laughs Off Reports of John Legend’s Cheating: “When do I get one of those Vanessa Bryant rings?”

Gwyneth Paltrow & Miranda Kerr: “I was like, ‘Is it weird to be that pretty?’ And she was like, ‘No.'”

Madonna & Gwyneth: “The Material Girl is a mean girl! An insider tells Hot Stuff that Madonna went out of her way to make ex-friend Gwyneth Paltrow miserable at the May 6 Met gala in NYC. The singer, 54, gave the actress the cold shoulder, then buddied up to her tablemate — and current Paltrow pal — Beyoncé. She chatted with Beyoncé for most of the evening and didn’t even glance at Gwyneth. Everyone talked about it.” They’ve been on the outs since 2009, when they split over mutual trainer Tracy Anderson. Madonna took it out on Gwyneth. “Madonna would shit on her, over and over,” according to a Paltrow source (or Paltrow?). “She feels Gwyneth abandoned her. Now Madonna will do anything to make her suffer.”

Jon Hamm: “I think dynamo would be the last word anyone would use to decribe me. More of the relaxa-mo, sort of sit-on-the-coucha-mo.”

Farrah Abraham on Why She Made Backdoor Teen Mom: “I already had naked photos of myself. The tape was extra self-esteem reassurance. It took a while to become happy with myself. In 2010, I was extremely depressed and wanted to kill myself, so I had surgery to make myself feel better. I had my boobs done and got a nose job and chin implants. I’m still in counseling, but the video is a way to celebrate my 21-year-old body while I am young.” OK. What about James Deen? “I feel like James wanted to date me, but I don’t trust him. And I don’t want to date a porn star. This was a one-time moment for me. But now that I’ve seen the footage in full, doing something with me was probably, like, the highlight of his life.” Is she going to make more porn? “No way! I’m not choosing that life. I’m getting an online master’s in business communication and I want to open a modern fusion restaurant in Austin that has a drunk driving campaign to help people make good choices. [Abraham was arrested for DUI in March and pleaded not guilty]. I really want to change the world.” What about dating? “I feel like I’m 38. My 38-year-old girlfriends don’t even have their lives together as much as I do. I’m just waiting for my man.”

Jennifer Lawrence: “I never went through a punk phase. I was a cheerleader!”

Misc/Etc: “The dress is punk, but the pink gave it personality” “I don’t like anything too frothy” “SO MUCH FOR IMMORTAL LOVE” “People change and forget to tell each other” “I’m always scared I’ll get caught taking a linen napkin from a restaurant.” “I felt like a duck!” “Upton tunes out the haters” “They get supermad” “Shall I throw or can I kick?” “before going back to blonde” “It’s superfun being a mom!” “Partying Like Punk Stars!” “a virtual fitting” “I ate fries and a grilled cheese today!” “Power Couple Parade!” “The bride wore black!” “a mashup of the Beastie Boys and Led Zeppelin blared while 16 witnesses blew bubbles” “I can’t wait to meet little Keanu Robocop!” “even packing their own baguettes”

Star

Idol Staff Slashed: “The set of American Idol is rife with tears, anger and crushed dreams — but not from the contestants! First Randy Jackson announced he was leaving the show and now Star has learned that after an all-time ratings low, producer of the iconic singing competition are planning to axe the remaining judges in a last-ditch attempt to revamp the ailing series.”

Sharon Stone: “I NEED A MAN, NOT A BOY.”

“The Rachel” Was Created on Weed: “Jennifer Aniston’s stylist Chris McMillan admits that he was stoned when he gave her the iconic Rachel cut from her Friends days.” I’ll bet Jen was stoned, too. We were all stoned; it was the ’90s.

Kyle Richards & Mauricio Umansky: “Mauricio has indeed saved his best sales pitches for beautiful women — and they’re anything but innocent!” His former coworker Lynne Langdon “described multiple other instances in which she’s witnessed Mauricio behaving unfaithfully to his wife of 17 years.” She “witnessed Mauricio hitting on two of my girlfriends. I could hear him telling them ‘You’re incredibly hot, I’d like to do you and get with you.'” Do you AND get with you? “It went on for several minutes while he made extremely inappropriate sexual comments and gestures. I was in shock.” Kyle had just given birth to his child. Lynne said Mauricio once “twisted my words around and said how nice it sounded for me to give him [oral sex]. I immediately turned the conversation back to real estate.” On camera Mauricio is “careful to make sure he was portrayed as the perfect husband. He’s very charming and sweet when he needs to be.”

Misc/Etc: “She told him to keep his mouth shut about her dad.” “enough dirt on Jessica to fill two tell-alls” “Most people find Scientology cultish and creepy” “He seemed like such a nice man, so it’s hard for her to understand why he would make fun of a pregnant woman.” “They bonded over their love of poetry and art” “the veterinary sedative ketamine” “the famed tennis court row of Benedict Canyon” “dressed as Bumblebee from Transformers on May 9 in North Hollywood” “the bride walked down the aisle to house music” “locals took in the great teeth of Tom” “You’re welcome ladies!” “the real reason behind their move is much darker”

OK!

Jennifer Lawrence & Nicholas Hoult: “When Jennifer Lawrence and Nicholas Hoult shared an intimate dinner at L.A.’s The Little Door restaurant April 29, it seemed the pair — who met on the set of 2011’s X-Men: First Class and split in January — were back on. Jennifer was gushing to her friends, telling everyone she could see a future with Nicholas, including marriage. But on May 6, J-Law and Nicholas avoided each other at the Metropolitan Museum of Art’s annual Costume Institute Gala, where she said they were ‘friends about to work on a film [X-Men: Days of Future Past] together.’ After the gala, Nicholas partied into the wee hours with Riley Keough — his co-star in the upcoming Mad Max: Fury Road and daughter of Lisa Marie Presley.” Lawrence was blindsided by Hoult hooking up with Keough. “It’s heartbreaking for Jennifer because she really loves him. She’s made of strong stuff so she’ll pull through — but she’s dreading the X-Men shoot now.”

Prince Harry in America: “No one is under any illusion as to how disastrous Harry’s last trip to the USA was.” They are referring, of course, to the “embarrassing photographs of Harry playing naked billiards in Las Vegas.” He’s back for six days this summer, and “under strict instructions from both his dad, Prince Charles, and his grandmother, Queen Elizabeth II, to be on his best behavior, no exceptions.” Don’t trust that ginger prince for one second. “The Queen adores Harry, even though he can push the boundaries of respect with his naughty sense of humor.”

Adele Tried Online Dating: “Before meeting her love (and baby daddy) Simon Konecki, Adele tried her luck on eHarmony.com.” But her fame got in the way. “I can’t put up a photo of myself, so I don’t get any emails!” she griped.

Eva Longoria Is Cool: “Eva Longoria is set to receive her master’s degree in Chicano Studies from California State University, Northridge, later this month. She enrolled in the school three years ago, and focused on studying Latinas in the science, technology, engineering, and mathematics fields.” SUCK IT, TONY PARKER.

Justin Bieber in Dubai: “Justin Bieber raced a borrowed white Lamborghini through the streets of Dubai last week, authorities said, earning him a number of speeding fines in the United Arab Emirates city.”

Street French for Kim Kardashian 

• “Ces couches-culottes viennent-elles dans une copie de guépard?” (“Do these diapers come in a cheetah print?”)
• “Oui, je suis souvent dit que je ressemble à Kim Kardashian.” (“Yes, I am often told that I resemble Kim Kardashian.”)
• “Aucun pain s’il vous plaît, j’observe les hydrates de carbone.” (“No bread please, I am watching my carbs.”)
• “Oui, je pense que Scott est une secousse aussi.” (“Yes, I think that Scott is a jerk too.”)

What Has Andy Cohen Learned About Women From The Real Housewives? “Constantly reapply your makeup if you’re ever in doubt.”

Misc/Etc: “April O’Neil, friend of the hard-shelled superheroes” “marred by nearby gunfire” “dressed down with a cuppa joe” “fearlessly took on the weather in his Superman raincoat” “Is this the figure of a woman who gave birth just nine weeks ago?” “we also have chickens, peacocks, and a retired horse” “HOT WHEELS” “We just have fun wherever we go” “When I’m in the club with him, it’s like no one else in the room exists — it’s just us two with each other. It’s romantic.” “He’s the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen in my life.” “EXPENSIVE WINE” “escaped SoCal for the rugged land of Mountain Time, far from prying eyes and paparazzi.”