Do not say the words “gluten-free beer” to Triumph the Insult Comic Dog. In fact, if Triumph is at the Great American Beer Festival — where hundreds of beer aficionados convene “to see what it’s like to not drink alone” — just turn around and leave. He’ll ruin your joy in savoring “unnecessary microbrews,” and he’ll make everyone on the Internet laugh while he does it.

• Speaking of Ron Burgundy: Anchorman + Ben & Jerry’s = Scotchy Scotch Scotch.
• What’s that you were saying about a cookbook, 2 Chainz? Couldn’t hear you over JA RULE’S MICROWAVE COOKBOOK.
• The follow-up to Ylvis’s “What Does the Fox Say” is a video about Massachusetts’s wonders with a weird recurring gay-panic theme. There’s some brilliance, though.
• Expect some major synergy between The Simpsons and the World Cup.
• Because Ricky Rozay tackling Drake’s “Hold On, We’re Going Home” wasn’t incongruous enough, he remixed Lorde’s “Royals.” Hard to argue with the Maybach Music tag paired with finger snaps.
• Meet your new Avatar villain, same as the old (dead) Avatar villain.
• At 4.5 million viewers, the TLC biopic won the best ratings of any original cable movie this year, and it’s also VH1’s strongest original movie ever.
• Soylent — dubbed a “geeky-nutrient-goop crusade” by Wired and possibly named after a certain Charlton Heston quote — raised $1 million and still somehow isn’t a hoax.
• Ed Norton’s SNL promos makes me really want to miss Ed Norton’s SNL episode.
• Everyone wants to be the genius who came up with nuking the fridge.
• How’s Benedict Cumberbatch look while he does motion-capture for The Desolation of Smaug? He looks petrifying. That’s how.
• And Downton Abbey and Sherlock will both be back in January.