It’s a book. And it’s not one of those Urban Outfitter-front-table “Cute Guys Holding Sea Otters” type of book, either. The mind-exploding screenwriter is writing a proper, real-deal novel, one that will be released by Grand Central Publishing and then probably win a Pulitzer and be required summer reading forever and get on Oprah’s Book Club. (Wait, do they not do Oprah’s Book Club anymore? OK, then they will resuscitate Oprah’s Book Club for this one.) It hasn’t yet been announced what the novel will be about, so hopefully it’ll be a biography of his imaginary twin brother Donald? Nicolas Cage could do the audiobook!

But Kaufman isn’t exactly leaving Hollywood behind: He’s still working toward his next directorial effort, Frank or Francis, a Hollywood satire/musical/classic-batshit-Kaufman movie. The last concrete word on that came back in the fall, when it was revealed that Steve Carell would be playing Frank, an Oscar-nominated director engaged in a feud with Francis, a vicious movie blog commenter played by Jack Black. Charlie’s also got a reunion with Spike Jonze somewhere on the docket, for an Illuminati satire in which “world leaders gather to figure out all the seismic events that will take place in the world, from oil prices to wars that will be waged.” Why aren’t these awesome-sounding Charlie Kaufman movies being made right now? Probably because the Illuminati is real and they’re mad at Charlie.