Boise State Broncos – Blue Turf game used 2002-2007 Orange/Blue — $12

I’ll be honest, I know it’s hip to be disaffected by things and “snarky” about them and whatever, but I think this item is very appropriately priced. It’s $12, roughly the same price for a movie ticket in most cities, and that seems like a very reasonable amount of money to pay for a piece of some pretty cool turf in a nice case. In fact, a quick call to a framing store tells me that if you had brand-new, not-particularly-special turf, and wanted that put in a case, it would most likely cost more than the $12 that this encased turf would cost! (Me: “How much would it cost to have a 3″-by-3″ piece of turf encased?” Frame store guy: “Sorry, we don’t do that here.”)

C. Early 1960’s Wilt Chamberlain Spalding Empty Basketball Display Box — $39.99

This week’s grossly overpriced item is this empty box with a picture of Wilt Chamberlain on it, which previously held a basketball and is now being sold for $40. Even if you’re the biggest Wilt fan and are like, “OK, I HAVE to have this box with Wilt’s face on it,” you’re still getting ripped off, because the box looks like it was hastily opened by some overzealous kid in the 60s who had no idea that 40 years in the future, there would be something called eBay on the Internet (which he also didn’t know would exist) by way of which he could sell, to a stranger, the box that he just opened like some sort of crazy animal. Did you really want to play with your basketball so badly that you couldn’t open the box like a more civilized person? Really? Is that how your parents raised you? Ugh, you disgust me.

Philadelphia Phillies Championship Ring — $15.50

This listing is for a fake ring. You, the purchaser of this ring, are not a champion. Is the eBay auction for this ring the first thing you’ve ever won in your entire life? It wouldn’t surprise me if it were. You are almost as bad as the kid who didn’t know how to properly open the Wilt Chamberlain basketball box.

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