Total Recall’s Three-Boobed Hooker Revealed, Blogged About
We’ll keep this brief, because you’ve waited long enough for it. Remember the three-boobed hooker the upcoming Total Recall reboot’s been promising you for months? (Of course you do. You’ve got one of those giant tear-off calendars on your wall to count down the days to the release date (August 3rd) so you can see a three-boobed hooker. Above that calendar is a sign that says “Three-Boobed Hooker Countdown Calendar.”)
Anyway: They’ve finally delivered the three-boobed hooker. You’ll have to go to TMZ to see her, because this is a Family Web-Site, and there are rules about the numbers of hooker-boobs we’re allowed to show you. (Two.) And just in case you’re wondering how many of the mutant mammaries are authentic, Kaitlyn Leeb, — IMDb’d as “Seductive Woman,” coyly — the actress who is bringing all your three-boobed-hooker-related fantasies to life, has tweeted a very important clarification.: “Just so everyone knows…all THREE breasts for total recall are a prosthetic piece. Meaning…NONE of them are mine! :)” There you have it: They are prosthetic and they are spectacular. Hope you’re happy, weirdos.
Filed Under: Total Recall
More from Mark Lisanti
-
‘Fear the Walking Dead’ Recap: Six Telltale Signs That You Can No Longer Ignore the Imminent Zombie Apocalypse
-
‘Fear the Walking Dead’: Which of Our New Friends Are Getting Eaten by the End of This Season?
-
Which Tom Cruise Is the Best Tom Cruise?
-
Bob Benson vs. The Man-Eating Lions: A Running Diary of CBS Animal-Uprising Epic ‘Zoo’
-
An Open Letter From A-Rod, on the Occasion of His 3,000th Hit
More Total Recall
-
The Definitive History of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s Greatest Action Movie Quips
-
Career Arc: Paul Verhoeven
-
YouTube HOF: The Summer Movie-est Summer Movies
-
Video on Demand Report: Catch Up on the Under and/or Correctly Rated Films You May Have Missed in 2012
-
An Interview With Total Recall’s Breakout Stars: The Three-Boobed Hooker’s Three Boobs
More Hollywood Prospectus
-
Brand Echh: Sandra Bullock and Billy Bob Thornton Can’t Save the Lame ‘Our Brand Is Crisis’
-
50 Scenes That Do Not Appear in the Fox ‘X-Files’ Revival
-
In Praise of Beach Slang, 2015’s Best, Most Sincere Rock Band
-
Who Was Missing From Taylor Swift’s Miami Squad?
-
Happy ‘Halloween’: The Best Horror-Movie Monsters