Led Zeppelin to Finally Arrive on Streaming Sites, Much to the Dismay of Lez Zepagain

Led ZeppelinHave you ever visited your trusty music streaming platform of choice and typed in an artist (say, Adele, during much of the meteoric rise of 21) and noticed that their songs weren’t available? Horrible feeling, right? Well, I charge that there is an even worse feeling than being let down, and that is one of being duped.

This is what has happened on numerous occasions as I’ve typed in “Led Zeppelin,” been thrilled to find a long list of familiar songs, and then, after 15 seconds, noticed something just sounded off. Upon closer inspection, I realized that the interesting notes, tones, and complete vocal performance I was listening to was not Led Zeppelin, but in fact, “Lez Zeppelin.” Or “Led Zepagain.” Or (this is just the rudest) “The Sounds of Led Zeppelin.” It’s like accidentally downloading Kidz Bop for adults. Just devastating for anyone with ears.

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Well soon, that may, thankfully, be changing. As reported by the New York Times, the band, which has sold over 300 million records worldwide, is in negotiations with a number of streaming services (including popular names like Rhapsody, Spotify, and Rdio, as well as the lesser-known France-based Deezer) for the rights to their catalog. This holding out isn’t new for the band, lest we forget they waited until 2007 to make the jump from warped vinyl to iTunes, so being digital drama queens (also known as “smart businessmen”) is just par for the course at this point.

Cheers to whichever one of these streaming services wins the Zeppelin Wars; may your company truly catch fire like the Hindenburg. And for the losers, may your company plunge to its untimely demise like that same, flaming, now plunging, Hindenburg.

Rembert Browne is a staff writer for Grantland.

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