Following Tim Allen and Martin Lawrence back to TV will be Roseanne Barr, who just signed a script deal with 20th Century Fox TV to write Downwardly Mobile, a sitcom about an “an optimistic blue-collar family living in hard times.” Casting is underway for a third Becky. Grade: B+ [Deadline]

Mark Wahlberg will broaden his horizons with a role as a law-enforcement official in 2 Guns, an adaptation of Steven Grant’s graphic novel about a DEA agent and an undercover naval officer who waste tax dollars by investigating each other as each steals money from the mob in the line of duty. Exiting the project, which has been kicking around for a while, are Vince Vaughn and David O. Russell, who must have just realized there’s no law that says he has to direct only Mark Wahlberg movies. Grade B [HR]

Jennifer Lopez will return to judge the next season of American Idol, says producer Nigel Lythgoe. Grade:A- [Deadline]

That beeping sound is coming from your nepotis-o-meter: Ava Sambora, daughter of Heather Locklear and Richie Sambora, will join Judd Apatow‘s untitled Knocked Up spinoff as the best friend of a character played by Maude Apatow. Grade: C [Variety]

Bruckheimer Television has scored a pilot commitment from CBS for an untitled procedural drama to star a no-nonsense mom who becomes a New York State trooper. She’s packing heat — and lunches, etc. Grade: C [Deadline]

Morgan Freeman will join Jesse Eisenberg, Melanie Laurent, Mark Ruffalo, and Amanda Seyfried in Now You See Me as a jerk magician who makes a career out of exposing other illusionists’ secrets. Grade: B+ [Variety]

Lifetime just ordered The Client List, an hour-long series based on the networks’ 2010 movie that starred Jennifer Love Hewitt as a deserted housewife who unwittingly takes a job in an erotic massage parlor. Hewitt — recently proven (via math) the worst actress of the past 25 years — also scored a development deal with the network, as well as a job directing a future Lifetime movie. We love happy endings. Grade: C+ [Deadline]

Previously: Russell Crowe Elected Mayor
Bryan Cranston to Be Eaten by Zombies
Walter White Could Do Terrible Things For Two More Seasons

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