Afternoon Links: Give Kanye a Time Machine for Christmas and He’ll Stop Jordan From Playing for the Wizards

On a Yeezus tour stop in Chicago, Kanye decided to use his Auto-Tuned “Runaway” improv sesh to sing about Michael Jordan instead of being pissed off about everything in the entire world. (’Tis the season!) It was such a hit, people actually started singing along a little. Kanye or not, you just don’t miss opportunities to sing the word wizards over and over in public.

Harry Potter is getting a West End theatrical prequel detailing “the previously untold story of Harry Potter’s early years as an orphan and outcast.” J.K. Rowling won’t write, but she’ll coproduce and assist the playwright.

Will Ferrell on Elf 2: “Absolutely not. I just think it would look slightly pathetic if I tried to squeeze back in the elf tights: Buddy the middle-aged elf.”

What’s it like being the token diversity hire in the writers’ room? Per Defamer’s Beejoli Shah: “My most recent experience with commodification came this June, as I interviewed for a job on the writing staff of CBS’ We Are Men. … ‘You’re Indian, so you can write for Kal [Penn], and you’re a girl, so you can write for Tony Shalhoub’s daughter, too!'” There’s plenty more.

What can’t Beyonce help you with?

The first of many dancetastic Ellen DeGeneres Oscars promos is here.

Metallica’s Antarctica concert is now available as a digital album called Freeze ‘Em All. This is the EXACT opportunity I’ve been waiting for to share this James Hetfield soundboard with you. HEYYYAAAAPPPEHHH HAWWWLIDAAAAYYYYEAHHHSSS!

David Mamet and Fox are teaming up for a miniseries about the seven deadly sins.

Jessica Lange will play Mark Wahlberg’s mom in The Gambler.

Hannibal is returning to NBC on February 28.

Cards Against Humanity raised $100,000 to help more than 38,000 students. But in true Cards Against Humanity fashion, they discuss the deplorable alternatives they could’ve opted to use the money for.

And here is Chance the Rapper’s TV debut, a performance of “Chain Smoking” on The Arsenio Hall Show. [via]

Filed Under: Jessica Lange, Kanye West, Loose Ends, Metallica, Michael Jordan, Will Ferrell

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