There’s no way Lionsgate is happy with Escape Plan‘s anemic debut, but we the people have received a golden treasure attached to the unnecessary movie’s existence: seven new videos on Arnold Schwarzenegger’s YouTube channel. They’re all clips of the Governator reinterpreting some of his classic lines via Reddit request, and they are genuinely Schwarztacular.

• NBC hates us and hates Parks and Recreation. Just kidding … SORT OF. They’re hitting pause on the show for three weeks, meaning we’ll get a Halloween episode in mid-November, and then Parks will only be back for two weeks before vanishing again for the rest of the year. Blerg.
• And in case you missed it: Community is back January 2, 2014, with back-to-back episodes.
• Lady Gaga and R. Kelly made this song, “Do What U Want,” and everyone seems very happy with/about it. Who knows which emotions you’ll experience when you hear it!
• Idris Elba is rumored to be in talks for Jurassic World, but why? What’s there to talk about and rumor about? Cast him. Done. Next decision.
• Speaking of Elba: A new Mandela trailer features the first new U2 song in three years.
• A clarification: Morrissey is “humasexual.”
• In which Azealia Banks makes another clip scientifically geared toward Tumblr/tries holding our attention while Broke With Expensive Taste continues to threaten to never be a real album.
• T-Swizzy-Swift is back with a song she co-wrote with fun.’s Jack Antonoff. It’s part of a soundtrack for a movie called “One Chance,” and that’s exactly what it sounds like.
• Jim Carrey wrote a children’s book. You can read it in regular voices or ridiculous ones.
• John Krasinski is in talks to join Bradley Cooper, Emma Stone, Rachel McAdams, Danny McBride, and Bill Murray for Cameron Crowe’s new movie. In Hawaii. Sounds like hell.
• Kevin Connolly says everyone’s onboard with the Entourage movie, and that production may begin soon. Whether this information is relevant to you depends on the path you’ve taken in life.
• And Bruce Campbell says Army of Darkness 2 is happening: “The last one was 22 years ago. I just haven’t been racing to do it. Sam Raimi is just a little bit busy making the biggest movies in Hollywood. I used to be busy. Now I’m not.”