Posts by Patrice Evans

  • Tyler Perry

    Occupy Tyler Perry

    Perhaps it’s a bit of a lowest-common-denominator hack move for me to joke that the 99% of Tyler Perry’s fans have decided to Occupy his blog in protest of casting Kim Kardashian in his new film “The Marriage Counselor”. I prefer to call it an homage. Alas, the perfectly ironic frosting on what figures to […]

  • Drake

    Drake vs. Tumblr

    If you missed it, Drake vs. Tumblr happened. He doesn’t like the silly emulating bloggers. Lots and lots of “turkeys” out there. Needless to say, this is the beef the world has been waiting for! It’s on now: Man vs. Technology! The collective hive mind vs the indomitable individual spirit. Auto-Tune vs. Autoreblog. Once more […]

  • Five Things To Remember When Making a Hip-Hop Concept Album

    Recently The Roots announced and previewed their next LP, undun. You may glean from the title’s lowercase styling that it’s a concept record. undun is “an existential re-telling of the short life of one Redford Stephens (1974-1999).” Or as Questlove says: “Undun is the story of this kid who becomes criminal, but he wasn’t born […]

  • The Kardashian Benediction

    For the (former) bride, let us bow our heads in prayer: This is no op-ed, father. We know your feeds only relay news pumped directly to our hearts. We ask you, oh heavenly host, to lead us through these shadows. Guide us around the perimeter of our heavy, curvy soul. We ask you, our timeless […]

  • Jay-Z Songs He Doesn’t Want His Daughter To Hear

    I’ve heard it said nothing transforms a man like having a baby girl. So news that Jay-Z and Beyoncé are having a daughter could mean we will never see or hear from the old Shawn Carter again. Old Jay-Z: “hard dick and bubble gum”. New Jay-Z: poopy diapers and baby food. It’s the beginning of […]

  • Kanye West

    Five Ideas to Promote Kanye’s G.O.O.D. Music Album

    A couple days ago, Kanye West tweeted that his next album — one presumed to be a compilation featuring artists signed to his G.O.O.D. Music imprint — will drop in Spring 2012. Which, more than anything else, served as a reminder of how much more entertaining the world was when Kanye was playing along. These […]

  • Nas’ “Nasty” Video: Not Bad for a 39-Year-Old Rapper

    In Never Scared, Chris Rock had some fun riffing about what it was like to be a 39-year-old hip-hop head. And I can personally remember The Chronic dropping and talking with friends about how this would be our generation’s smooth-jazz retirement music. I’m still looking forward to bumping “Let Me Ride” as I lean back […]

  • Malcolm-Jamal Warner’s Reed Between the Lines: Probably Not the Next Cosby Show

    After checking out the two-episode premiere of BET’s new sitcom Reed Between the Lines last night, I stuck around to watch its star, Malcolm-Jamal Warner, on The Wendy Williams Show (TWWS was better than expected. The best illustration of the tone of her show is a bit where Wendy jiggered her wig back to show […]

  • West

    Five Rappers Who Should Experiment With Psychedelic Drugs, Like Steve Jobs Did

    In 1997, Steve Jobs fired shots at Bill Gates: “I just think he and Microsoft are a bit narrow. He’d be a broader guy if he had dropped acid once or gone off to an ashram when he was younger.” Get it? I’m a Mac, and you need some LSD. A few year later in […]

  • Negropedia

    You Might Be a Rapper: Steve Jobs, Susan Sontag, Norman Mailer, Dr. Seuss

    Rappers are often accused of: 1. Narcissism: inserting themselves into commentary on news/current events (bloggers as rappers) 2. Indulging in an impenetrable stream-of-consciousness style (Portrait of the Artist as a Young Rapper) 3. Substituting visceral, intuitive feeling for intellectual rigor (singer-songwriters as rappers) 4. Being politically or socially conscious in a preachy way (liberal do-gooders, […]

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