The Headliner

Side Effects

According to Steven Soderbergh, this is the last feature film he intends to direct, which I find hard to believe given that, between September 2011 and this one coming out, earlier this year, he directed four movies (and, since his “retirement” hasn’t precluded his making the sublime Behind the Candelabra, premiering on HBO Sunday AND YOU BETTER BE PLANNING TO WATCH).

But let’s pretend Soderbergh means it: As a finale to a filmography as celebrated and varied as Soderbergh’s, Side Effects is not so grand, but it’s worth seeing. Rooney Mara plays a young woman dealing with the return of her husband (Channing Tatum) from prison, where he was serving a sentence on some kind of financial hoo-ha; Jude Law is the psychiatrist who treats her after she starts showing signs of a mental breakdown, and who soon comes to think she may be a more complicated patient than he’d thought. The plot is satisfyingly twisty, and if Mara never plays anything but barely stable waifs from now on (see also: The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo), we’ll probably all be just fine with that.

New and Notable

The Last Stand

You might think you’ve seen this movie, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger as a rampaging lawman, one or possibly 10 times before, BUT WAIT! This one’s different! It also has Johnny Knoxville!

 

Beautiful Creatures

This story of a teenage girl on the cusp of becoming either a good or bad witch was adapted from a popular YA novel series and was talked about as a possible next Twilight. But since there’s been no talk of a sequel, it’s … not.

 

Parker

You might think you’ve seen this movie, starring Jason Statham as a Cockney hard-case, one or possibly 10 times before, BUT WAIT! This one’s different! It also has Jennifer Lopez!

 

Hooligan

If the trailer for this documentary about football fan violence makes me never want to attend a game anywhere in Europe, I can’t imagine how brutal the actual movie must be.

 

Picture Day

Orphan Black‘s Tatiana Maslany plays an aimless high schooler splitting her time between a kid she used to babysit and an older musician.

 

Yossi

In this sequel to Yossi and Jagger, Yossi tries to move on from the loss of Jagger years earlier.

 

Open Road

Camilla Belle is a homeless girl on a (vague) quest; Colin Egglesfield is the nice cop who helps her out. With sexy results, probably.

 

This Girl Is Bad-Ass!!

This movie looks like what Premium Rush might have been like if the lead had been (a) a woman, and (b) an incredible martial artist.

 

Last Kind Words

If you meet a pretty girl in the woods of Kentucky, she’s probably a murderer, and possibly a demon as well.

 

The Deep

The survivor of an Icelandic shipwreck struggles to deal with the aftermath of the catastrophe.

 

H.P. Lovecraft’s Cool Air

After suffering a heart attack, a blocked screenwriter falls in with a very weird doctor.

 

Once Upon a Time in Brooklyn

A mobbed-up kid gets out of prison, confused about which path in life is right for him to take. Fortunately, Ice-T is there to advise him.

 

After Dark Originals: Dark Circles

This movie is proof — as if proof were needed — that having an infant will make you crazy, or kill you, or both.

 

“In Theaters” VOD Picks

Kid-Thing

Annie, an unsupervised brat, is probably the worst person to happen to hear a woman calling for help from inside an old well.

 

Opportunistic Backlist Revival Theme of the Week: Gross-Out Comedies

Apparently as a direct rebuke to the “Literary Classics Collection” that is also still available if you like that sort of thing (nnnnnnnnnnnnnerd!), TWC has put together this list of comedies that are reliant, in whole or in part, on body functions and/or bawdiness: Bridesmaids, Baby Mama, Road Trip, Knocked Up, Old School, The 40 Year Old Virgin, Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle, Hot Tub Time Machine, Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy, and many others, the best of which is my beloved Wet Hot American Summer. Great, now I need to watch it right now.

 

Masochist’s Choice

God’s Country

Your typical evil developer vs. Man Of God story. Bonus evil points: Developer’s trying to build a CASINO!