Actress Shannon Richardson (The Walking Dead) has been arrested on charges that she sent ricin-laced threats to President Obama and New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg. Richardson had initially contacted authorities to say that she’d found “suspicious materials” in her fridge and claiming that her husband had sent the letters (“You will have to kill me and my family before you get my guns”; “Anyone who wants to come to my house will get shot in the face”). Well, that’s one way to get your StarMeter to shoot up 6,453% in a week. Probably not the best way, but definitely a way. Stop it, you guys! STOP IT!

• It appears that the Lonely Island have been to college and learned to use the “transvestite hermaphrodites representing absolutely nothing,” also known as the semicolon. Alanis Morrissette assists.
• To wallpaper your college dorm, perhaps.
• Tupac’s first business card, with a pager number. 143 80085 911.
• Nathan Fielder gets more kids grounded forever.
• The Night Stalker Richard Ramirez has joined his dark master in the underworld. R.I.P.?
• Daaaaayum, Janelle Monáe. Way to net the special guest stars.
• Woody Allen’s Blue Jasmine takes San Francisco, and it looks so good.
• In case you missed it: Jonah Hill gives a very cranky interview to Rolling Stone.
• NOOOO! THE DEVELOPERS WANT TO TAKE OUR EYES!
• One of Anonymous’s Steubenville heroes unmasks himself, reveals a soft inner core of bro.
• Paramount is bickering with JPMorgan.
• Amazon launches a tool for the visual-minded.
• The Purge creams The Internship at the box office. Now you go hate-read The Internship’s reviews (it “is kind of a terrible movie and perhaps it’s sad to think it exists“). Go ahead. I’ll wait.
• “New York’s hottest club is ZZZZZZZZZ. Located on the top floor of FAO Schwarz, this nightmare chamber has it all: teeming insects, nipple torture, a private VIP room where a bald rich guy will stare through your soul while eating a fancy dinner covered in live flies, and a human ottoman. You know, that thing where a dude in fetish gear kneels on the ground and Dick Van Dyke trips over him, over and over again?” And other Nine Inch Nails videos that are promotional material for Stefon’s favorite nightclubs.