Posts by Chris Ryan

  • Must Watch: Awesome German Football Crowd Choreography

    When I say choreography, you no doubt turn to the mirror and say, in an aggressive whisper, “FOSSE.” But I’m not talking about all that jazz. I’m talking about crowd choreography; glorious, coordinated showings of team, school or regional pride. This weekend saw a particularly breathtaking example of such a movement. Above you can see […]

  • Rankonia: The Triangle Power Rankings

    1. David Freese, St. Louis Cardinals Any time you more or less live out the lifelong dream of every American child born since the invention of the Hershey’s Bar, you get your name at the top of our power rankings. I don’t care if we’re ranking the biggest G’s in Western Hemisphere needlepoint; David Freese […]

  • Mario Balotelli

    The Reducer: Week 9, Burning Down the House

    Manchester City lights up United, while Newcastle’s French Revolution continues.

  • So, Detroit, What Do You Think of Tim Tebow Now?

    From this piece by Michael Silver on Yahoo! Sports, which should probably be read while the instrumental to Jay-Z’s “Takeover” plays in the background: “Can you believe ‘15’?” one Detroit Lions defender asked after his team’s 45-10 immolation of Tebow and the Denver Broncos. “Come on — that’s embarrassing. I mean, it’s a joke. We […]

  • Tony La Russa Retires

    Talk about going out on top. Or at least going out the day after the parade celebrating your third World Series win as a manager and second in five years. According to reports, St. Louis Cardinals manager Tony La Russa has retired. Cardinals chairman Bill DeWitt Jr. made the announcement, saying, “Tony leaves behind a […]

  • Watch Steve Buscemi Die Over And Over Again

    Yo, spoiler alert, the above video features Steve Buscemi get shot in the head, shot in the face, shot in the stomach, shot all over body by automatic rifle fire, hit with throwing knives (TREJO!), axed and wood-chipped, have a heart attack, and get stabbed in the back. I’m sure I missed something, but don’t […]

  • The Philadelphia Eagles’ Asante Samuel Ruffles Some Feathers

    I have no metric to really quantify how bad the Philadelphia Eagles defense has looked this season other than “a couple dozen.” I have slammed my head into a flat surface “a couple dozen” times since this season began, watching missed tackle after missed tackle, carving “WEAPON X. 1996-2008” into my arm. Oh my God. […]

  • Tebowing

    Is Tebowing the New Planking?

    Because what planking needed was a bit more Tim Tebow. Behold the newish trend/meme/party trick: Tebowing. Pretty simple premise: You get down on one knee, put your clenched fist to your forehead in prayer (or something), close your eyes, and think of Tebow. The Tebowing site features some great examples of people Tebowing at a […]

  • Going All Philip Rivers About Philip Rivers Not Going All Philip Rivers This Season

    Some folks have been giving San Diego quarterback Philip Rivers some heat this week for not playing up to his admittedly high standards against the New York Jets this past Sunday. I’m not really worried about Philip Rivers not playing like Philip Rivers; I’m more concerned with Philip Rivers not acting like Philip Rivers.

  • Must Watch: Tim Tebow Super Fans Rap Video

    Hey, you know what your life was missing? A rap tribute song and music video dedicated to Tim Tebow. Behold, “Super Fans” by Zoonadu Productions, which is apparently made up of a couple of MCs, Skinny Pete from Breaking Bad, and a Nicki Minaj impersonator. YouTube comments on this range from “Can I get this […]

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