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Brian Shaw, Jason Kidd, and Their Best Kept Secret

Shaw-Kidd

You may have heard that the Denver Nuggets hired Brian Shaw this week. This comes on the heels of the Brooklyn Nets hiring Jason Kidd. And you know what that means?

We now have two rapping head coaches in the NBA. You know what that means.

IT.

IS.

GOIN’.

DOWWWWWWWN.

Yes, we embedded three Flex bombs there. That is not a mistake.

In one corner, we have Brian Shaw, reminding us that people don’t know, and it’s a damn shame. “Anything Can Happen”:

Important lyrics:

It’s so tragic,
Man if I had magic,
I’d make a wish for the homies who got blasted,
You feel me?
That’s real G.

In the other corner, there’s Jason Kidd, telling us all what a day in the life of J-Kidd be like, and how he’s whoopin’ ass like Jim Kelly. “What the Kidd Didd”:

Everybody got the eyes peeled back,
Cops lookin for a chance to jack,
Every chick that I pass, is smilin’ and wavin’,
Damn near turnin’ flips on the pavement!

We also learn from his co-star Money B that “Ain’t no party like a J-Kidd party ’cause a J-Kidd party don’t stop,” but then J-Kidd interjects, saying that there ain’t no J-Kidd party at all, because there’s all these haters on his jock.

It’s all from the seminal album B-Ball’s Best Kept Secret.

Now you might be wondering: If this were a rap battle, who would win?

But that’s a trick question, because these are two totally different types of songs. J-Kidd is trying to party and tell us about chicks doing backflips on the pavement, while B-Shaw is getting way more introspective. You listen to “What the Kidd Didd” when you’re getting ready to go out and have a good time. You listen to “Anything Can Happen” when you’re alone on a Wednesday night, then B-Shaw pops onto your iPod and you start thinking about life and the choices that come to define us.

Anyway, what’s most important to note today is that (a) these songs exist, and (b) there’s a clear trend in the NBA: All of pro basketball’s best new coaches are rappers. Are there first-time NBA coaches in 2013 who haven’t recorded a rap song?

They better fix that soon.

WHERE YOU AT, MIKE BUDENHOLZER?

(h/t The Denver Post)