For a person of a certain disposition (hi), the arrival of summer can feel like it comes with a lot of pressure to … like, do things? Outside? Look, I didn’t become a pop culture writer with a focus on TV because I enjoy letting the sun beating down on my vulnerable, fish-belly-like skin (and yes, I have already gotten my first burn of the year). So at first when I saw that Dark Skies was out on VOD, my thought was, “This is the perfect way to counterprogram the weather: I’ll post up on the couch and revel in the skies’ darkness and screw the actual beautiful sunshine outside!”
Then I watched the trailer and found out that Dark Skies is also part of the hiking-industrial complex’s relentless propaganda machine. Whereas some horror movies are content to make you scared of terrible things aliens could do to you, or terrible things that can happen in your house, Dark Skies gets greedy and throws in both. Apparently, the alien that’s specifically targeted my family for destruction might initially make its presence known by installing a naive art exhibit in my living room? That’s the most benign thing that happens in the trailer, and I would probably hate it more than being made to bang my head against my front picture window.
New and Notable
Will (Max Thieriot), who’s been preparing his whole life to die of cystic fibrosis at any time, is unprepared for survival.
Ewan McGregor narrates this documentary about the first zero-emissions motorcycle Grand Prix.
After Allies kill their Nazi parents, siblings must navigate post-WWII Germany, with the help of a freed concentration camp inmate who poses as their older brother.
Iron Man: Rise of Technovore
If Iron Man 3 hasn’t sated your Iron Man craving, there’s also this animated film.
“In Theaters” VOD Pick
A gay Englishman marries a woman in order to stay in the U.S. with his partner, because that always ends well and the government never finds out!
Early VOD Release
The Secret Disco Revolution
This documentary looks like methadone to help you come down from Behind the Candelabra heroin.
Hammer of the Gods
This looks like 300, if it were set in A.D. 793 Britain and everyone was cold.
Weird Indie of the Week
In the ’70s, a golf-obsessed kid has to adjust to life with his conventional mother after growing up with his freewheeling hippie father.
Baby Mama’s Club
Guys have babies, are scared of said babies’ mothers.