The bankrupt Eastman Kodak company has asked out of its naming agreement for the Kodak Theatre, the current Home of the Oscars, potentially desecrating 10 proud, corporate-sponsored years of awards-hosting tradition. Should its request be granted, the venue’s going to need a new name, and quickly. So rather than allow the Academy and the owners of Hollywood’s favorite tourist-clogged malltertainment destination suffer the embarrassment of a blank marquee, we’re here to help line them up with potential sponsors and names.
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• Grauman’s Chinese Oscardome
• The B of A Reasonable Access Fee Debit Card Theatre
• The David Geffen Oscar Playhouse
• In-N-Out Arena
• The Hollywood Chamber of Commerce Hall of Sad, Costumed Panhandler Justice
• The Steven Spielberg Automatic Bid Pavilion
• GoDaddy.com’s Visit Our Website to See Some Bullshit Involving Meryl Streep in a Bra OscarTittytown
• Armen’s Hollywood T-Shirt and Bong Stall Awards Annex
• The Better Luck Next Lifetime, Brett Ratner Amphitheater Sponsored by Verizon
• The Weinstein Company Oscar Museum and Conference Center