Previously on the Eastbound & Down non-narrative YouTube recap: Eastbound & Dubstep and The Search for a Real-Life Kenny Powers. This week: All Things Myrtle Beach.
https://www.youtube.com/v/73nVC1zZeQw?version=3&hl=en_US
The real Myrtle Beach baseball team is called The Pelicans, and this terrifying clam that shoots baseball pearls is its mascot.
https://www.youtube.com/v/f0gzmUsDM9I?version=3&hl=en_US
Hard Rock Park was a music-centric theme park in Myrtle Beach with a Led Zeppelin roller coaster, a Magic Mushroom Garden featuring the “world’s largest blacklight poster,” and something called Phonehenge. After a brief failed makeover as Freestyle Music Park — sadly, having nothing to do with Freestyle music — the park was foreclosed on in 2009. Luckily, YouTube has preserved the coolest-looking attraction; a psychedelic dark ride based around “Nights in White Satin,” the epic classic by The Moody Blues. The ride aims to mimic an entheogen, or at least a surreal experience, with lights and druggy projections. The members of the all-American family cast in this ride promo for Sally Corp. seem relatively undisturbed after their trip.
https://www.youtube.com/v/jpUmp8yMoF0?version=3&hl=en_US
“this is the best week of my life”
https://www.youtube.com/v/cFSZ2VsnPuQ?version=3&hl=en_US
Suck my left one, Kate Upton!
https://www.youtube.com/v/suG-sXPaJT0?version=3&hl=en_US
Cat Fight: Charleston vs. Myrtle Beach!
https://www.youtube.com/v/9YngFjWrZno?version=3&hl=en_US
“sex things all over it”
https://www.youtube.com/v/COc-Nr0G2Nc?version=3&hl=en_US
Just like the pool party from Boogie Nights, but with more leather.
https://www.youtube.com/v/5cJdqb3rSiA?version=3&hl=en_US
Hell is a beachfront Irish bar after hours.
https://www.youtube.com/v/eV7CGxfrJ7E?version=3&hl=en_US
How To Shag Tonight? Learn to do the Funky Applejack.
https://www.youtube.com/v/CFbk3MaGM_U?version=3&hl=en_US
Myrtle Beach Daze with Banana Jack.
https://www.youtube.com/v/wIGg13C4Zec?version=3&hl=en_US
Spotted in Lynchburg, S.C. on the way to Myrtle Beach Black Bike Week: Kool-Aid Twists car, Cool Whip car, Raiders car, candy-apple red Denali with red rims and scissor doors, white fishnet dresses, and a King Size 3 Musketeers Expedition.
https://www.youtube.com/v/aWAcs9xL2dA?version=3&hl=en_US
“You can’t throw random objects, you stupid bitch!”
https://www.youtube.com/v/2Ao2pjporLw?version=3&hl=en_US
Jimmy Valiant in Myrtle Beach (to the sounds of Joe Walsh) May, 1984.
https://www.youtube.com/v/ZV95O7LHjLc?version=3&hl=en_US
“You’re now rocking with your boy J-Sneez.”
https://www.youtube.com/v/7IfR51tqmGo?version=3&hl=en_US
See you at Taylor J. Burt’s Tribal Thursdays at Zulu Lounge!