Scene From the Aquatics Center, Starring Kevin Durant and Andre Iguodala

[Ring, ring, ring]
Andre Iguodala: Go for Iguodala.
Kevin Durant: Andre.
Igudoala: You’ve got Andre. Go for Andre.
Durant: Andre. It’s Kevin.
Iguodala: …

Durant: Right next to you.
Igudoala: Come on, dude. Melo was going to talk to you about this. It’s really creepy when you do this. I’m right here, man.
Durant: Listen to me.
Iguodala: You’re right next to me! Who else am I list —
Durant: I want you to keep looking forward, don’t move your head …
Iguodala: Who are you? Jason Bourne? Don’t tell me where to point my head.
Durant: Shh.
Iguodala: Goddamn it, Kevin.
Durant: Keep looking forward. Good. Now, we are, in all likelihood, getting our picture taken. And I just feel like as teammates, as two dudes going on this journey together, and as two dudes at this pool, I need to tell you what you look like.
Iguodala: Yo, Kev, seriously …
Durant: You look like a guy who has been looking forward to going to Dave & Buster’s all week.
Iguodala: You live in Oklahoma. Have you even seen the inside of a Dave & Buster’s?
Durant: You look like you are the bass tech for Morris Day & The Time.
Iguodala: I am. The captain. Of the Philadelphia 76ers.
Durant: You look like you own Police Academy 2 on LaserDisc and you know remote control shortcuts to get to all of the Michael Winslow scenes.
Iguodala: I’m hanging up now.
Durant: Andre.
Iguodala: … Yes?
Durant: These little talks really mean a lot to me. Nobody listens. Not like you.

FIN.

Filed Under: Andre Iguodala, Kevin Durant, Olympic Games, Olympics, Team Usa

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Chris Ryan is an editor at Grantland.

Archive @ chrisryan77