Dear Every Team in the NBA: Your Rookies Are Phenomenal

Every year, teams throughout the NBA draft rookies. The hope is that these rookies will positively contribute to the franchises’ success. Some years, the rookie crop is extremely talented. Other years, not so much. We’ll see how this year’s rookie class does on the basketball court soon enough, but they’re already making their presence known when it comes to being total clowns.

The video above, by way of Stashed, makes it pretty clear. Here we have the rookies not only discussing the music they enjoy, but also taking part in NBA Rookie Karaoke.

Immediate thoughts, by way of former NBA first-round draft picks Rembert Browne and Andrew Sharp …

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Browne: I wish they were all my little brothers.

Sharp: I’m just so glad this video exists. The Silver era is going great. David Stern would have had this host killed for letting Marcus Smart recite YG lyrics.

Browne: LOOK AT NOAH VONLEH AND P.J. HAIRSTON.

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Vonleh has very real Photoshop potential. I will be on the lookout for this all season.

Sharp: I was hooked as soon as Smart said, “I got a mixture of everything … don’t have country.” And then Jabari. And Cleanthony. Cleanthony! All of them. James Young, even Shabazz at the end. And Stauskas with the Biebz. At least he went for it with the falsetto.

Browne: I’m not done with Vonleh. Because he picked Migos to rap. And not any Migos song, but the Quavo verse from “Freak No More.” If this kid ever becomes an Atlanta Hawk, I’ll move back home.

Sharp: Juliet saw the Stauskas clip and said, “Poor Nik. He’s our guy.” We gotta get Stauskas out of Sacramento.

Browne: I thought it was very cute that Tyler Ennis censored himself on his Drake flow, as if he knew at some point this would get back to the parents. I’ve been there, Tyler. (See: “every single thing I wrote on Grantland between 2011 and 2013.”)

Sharp: On the opposite end of the spectrum, I felt pretty good about Zach LaVine’s future until he described his iPod. “A lot of Chief Keef. A lot of Chief Keef.” If his career ends up in the gutter one day, we’ll know why.

Browne: What were your three favorite moments?

Sharp: 3. James Young’s high-pitched laugh after the sprained ankle line, tied with Marcus Smart’s face during Stauskas.

2. Cleanthony starting in on the Wayne verse, and then going … and going … and GOING. And grinning like a 12-year-old the entire time.

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1. JABARI. There can be no losers in karaoke, but there can be winners, and Jabari is the clear winner here. I wasn’t prepared for that. His selection (“Dead Presidents II”) was 10 times better than anyone else’s, his delivery was perfect, he censored the curse words like a brand-conscious veteran … Jabari could be president one day.

You?

Browne: 3. James Young’s disappointment with new Weezy: “Lil Wayne — the old-school Lil Wayne, of course.”

2. Russ Smith saying that he listened to Lil B.

1. Cleanthony, attempting to get a record deal with his Rap City: Tha Basement–length verse.

Sharp: OK. How should we end this? Embiid?

Browne: Probably Embiid. He’s earned it.

Sharp: I wish every day were rookie media day.

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Filed Under: NBA, Joel Embiid, Noah Vonleh, Nik Stauskas, Marcus Smart, Andrew Sharp, Rembert Browne, james young

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