If you always felt that the erotic subtext of Two and a Half Men needed to be explored in the context of Japanese television, you’re not alone. The Out Couple! parody is ready to shed light on the story of “two men in progressive America” (you know, “badgers from the same hole”) and the “sparkling feelings they kept deep inside their hearts.” Let us rejoice in “white creamy love wonderment.”

• Paul Giamatti joins Downton Abbey, “upset[s] the Grantham’s apple cart.”
• R.I.P. Gary David Goldberg, creator of Family Ties.
• A posthumous moonwalk at the wax museum. Speaking of wax museums, send these guys back to replica-making college.
• An ode to Miley’s booty.
• Weed Guy vs. Beer Guy.
• “What’s North of North? Nothing.”
• Accidental troll bait.
• That’s a weird-looking cat.
• An oral Exile.
• Headline of the day: “Egyptian Statue Mysteriously Spinning, Stargate To Open Shortly.”
• The “new math” of TV revenue.
• I will interpret this as the first clue that the Broadway holograms are coming.