Afternoon Links: The Pepper Potts Sex Tape Iron Man 3 Director Shane Black Couldn’t Show You
Normally I’m all for cutting movies into manageable portions, but I’m going to make an exception and say that Iron Man 3 should have retained the scene in which a sex tape featuring Pepper Potts and Aldrich Killian gets broadcast at a Home Depot. Time to dust off the old “I cried when I wrote this song, sue me if I play too long” excuse. Director Shane Black and co-writer Drew Pearce recently discussed this discarded plot gem in a spoiler-riddled (I warned you!) podcast, saying that the scene was “audacious even by our standards.” Guess we’ll have to use our imaginations to project XXX-GOOP onto every screen in the home theater aisle.
- Sony begs you to save Community with a YouTube video. It will make you feel bad, as though you just left a dinner party at which you could not eat more than one bite of the meatloaf that was served to you, and everyone noticed. Read the comments if you want to ponder the broken Nielsen ratings system, or skip this one entirely if you gave up on the show after Dan Harmon left.
- Dear Puritans, we need to review the guidelines for sideboob. You want to talk about sideboob? I can (NSFW) talk about sideboob.
- James Franco hurt director Justin Lin’s feelings with some disparaging remarks about Annapolis: “He’s going on publicly about stuff and I honestly don’t understand it. I think James is a good guy, but I don’t know. I wish he would just not say anything because — it’s going to be part of him, he’s obviously very successful.” Put down the slam book, guys! Haters are your motivators!
- Benicio del Toro is in talks to join Paul Thomas Anderson’s Inherent Vice in a small but “potentially scene-steal[ing]” role!
- Nana? Is that you? What were you doing at the Met Ball?
- R.I.P.: the real Marge Simpson.
- TNT orders Michael Bay’s Last Ship.
- Who cares if it’s real? It’s a halfcat. When he lazily pursues a career in improv comedy, he can be a HALFASSSSCAT.
- Speaking of asssses, this hoverbike with Wi-Fi looks particularly inhospitable in the seat department.
- It’s the long good-bye.
- Shut up, mom, I’m playing Watergate!
- Aren’t you glad you paid your taxes?
- Cheers writer Ken Levine doesn’t want you to pick up Zach Braff’s tab: “Zach Braff has contacts. Zach Braff has a name. Zach Braff has a track record. Zach Braff has residuals. He can get in a room with money people. He is represented by a major talent agency. But the poor schmoe in Mobile, Alabama or Walla Walla, Washington has none of those advantages. […] If you only have so much money to give to charity, give it to cancer research and not to help redecorate Beyonc&233;’s plane.”